Rebellion, Race and Reality in 2020
It has been an ongoing saying in my family, “2020 is coming for our lives!” Never did we think that it would be what it has turned out to be. 2019 was pretty rough for us with my mother being shot in the neck by teenagers who were trying to steal a bike from her yard. We thought 2020 would be better. A year of vision. A path forward, and all of that other good stuff. In fact, my co-wife and I hosted a wonderful Muslimah Influencer’s Summit...
Salaam/Peace!
We have gotten so many questions as well as comments about polygyny from those who are in polygyny as well as those who have never understood why people would practice this ancient form of marriage that predates monogamy as well as Islam. Yes, polygyny is not just for Muslims, and yes polygyny was practiced before monogamy became the standard. Islam just happened to regulate it where there are rules and restrictions when it comes to this marital union.
What is polygyny?...
As I create this blog, I sit reflecting about the days when I couldn’t fathom having a “co-wife.” I unknowingly conditioned myself to be unwilling to accept the fact, that one day my husband may want to marry again. In believing that assumption, I set myself up to never need to communicate with another with another wife, nor facilitate or cultivate a relationship with one. To practice polygyny was a topic that I mentally filed under,” Do not...
Our Muslimah Influencer Summit – How It Came to Fruition and a Recap of the Event
As-salaamu alaykum/ Peace
My co-wife Coach Fatimah and I had an amazing time conducting our Outstanding Personal Relationships Presents: The Muslimah Influencer Summit. It was a smashing success! We worked hard on getting things together and we are very grateful to the presenters for their contribution and their professionalism.
When we had the idea, thanks to our husband and partner, Coach Nazir,...
“Ummi (Mommy) has a baby in her belly! I’m going to be a big sister!” Beautiful brown eyes look up in dancing amazement. “Yes, you are and you are going to be the best big sister to your baby sister, I just know it.” After several months of wild anticipation, the baby arrives. Not once did this young girl, excited about being a big sister, have a thought in her mind that her parents would love her any less when her baby sister arrived. Even after the arrival of...
by Coach Fatimah
Vulnerability is defined as the quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either physically or emotionally. As I read the definition of “vulnerability” I suddenly was submerged in my own past moments where I met vulnerability at the fork in my own emotional road. A few words in the definition spoke to me. The word “attacked” or “exposed” in my own personal life I have given this word great power over...
I write this with tears in my eyes as I think about families mourning the losses of their beloved men in their lives. I write this with tears in my eyes as I think about the losses of the beloved men in my life as well as the lives of my co-wife and our husband. These men were instrumental in many ways for the growth, power, strength and care that we tap into through our day to day. And in the wake of receiving news that a man, who was known throughout our community as a great man, a giver,...
Salaam/Peace,
As the ritual of setting New Year's Resolutions begins with the call for closing the door on the decade culminating with 2019 and unfounded optimism surrounds 2020 with cute slogans like 'clear vision' and promises to change, I reflect.
As I look back 30 years to 1989 as a new teenager going through puberty not knowing what the future held. I was the oldest of six children dealing with dysfunction that was far too common and would begin to shape some of my core beliefs. Many of...
Coach Fatimah & Nyla have been part of polygyny for 9 years and discuss how they manage stress and their household dynamics being different even though they are married to the same man, Coach Nazir.
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Many times when women discuss men being married to more than one woman, one knee jerk question tends to be, "why can't I have more than one husband?!"
Quick quips and reactive responses hardly are well thought out questions. Very few societies have ever practiced polyandry (women having more than one husband) and thrived. There are many reasons why but we focus on just a few reasons why it makes more sense to us why polygyny is more the natural way then other forms of polygamy.
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