"Happy wife, happy life." I first heard that before I was a teenager from my uncles and other elders.

It’s one of the most common, and most damaging, pieces of advice given to me and other men. 

It sounds harmless, but it’s a philosophy of appeasement. It tells a man to sacrifice his vision, suppress his needs, and shrink himself to fit into a box of someone else's comfort. 

It promotes the feminization of men, turning leaders into followers in their own homes.

For the high-performer, the ma...